If you’re dipping your toes into vibrator play, the humble bullet vibe is the perfect place to start. They’re among the simplest and most beginner-friendly toys on the market.
They’re designed for clitoral stimulation, but you can use them on other areas to discover erogenous zones you may have overlooked. Just remember to add lube, both for comfort and to help achieve orgasm.
Getting Started
The world of sex toys can be an intimidating place for a first-timer. With so many types of vibrators out there, from the adorable-looking bunny vibes to the tiny bullet vibes, it can be hard to figure out what to buy and how to use it. But with a little research and some patience, you’ll be able to find a vibrator that works for your unique pleasures.
Once you’ve chosen your perfect toy, be sure to read the instructions and cleaning tips carefully. It’s also important to fully charge it before a session, since vibrators that don’t have enough juice can cause discomfort and even burn your skin. You may also want to invest in a sex toy cleaner, which is usually sold in the same store as vibrators and will help you keep your toy sanitary.
If you’re shopping online, consider checking out user reviews before making a purchase. You’ll often find incredibly detailed and descriptive descriptions of how a particular toy works and feels, but be careful not to base your decision solely on one person’s experience.
Vibrators are great for solo play, but they’re also a great way to add a little extra pleasure into a relationship. If you’re nervous to suggest it to your partner, just remember that masturbation is totally normal and can actually be very beneficial for your physical and mental health.
Using a Bullet Vibe
Most small vibrators are bullet-shaped and designed for external use, rather than internal penetration (unless they have a substantial flange or are specifically designed for anal sex). As such, you should always apply lubricant before using a new sex toy for the first time. This will ensure you get the most out of your vibe and prevent friction, irritation, and even potential harm.
A quality water-based lube like Good Clean Love is ideal because it’s affordable, body-safe, and easy to clean off. You can also experiment with a variety of different lubricants and ingredients to see what you prefer. Just be sure to use a safe amount of lube, as overdoing it can lead to discomfort.
Once you’ve applied your lubricant, you can start playing with your bullet vibe. Cooper recommends dragging it along your inner thigh or arm to see how the tip feels as it glides across your skin. Then, “explore the pressure and various vibrations your toy offers,” she says.
During solo play, you can use a bullet to stimulate your clitoris or perineum, tease your nipples, and more. If you’re feeling more adventurous, try resting your bullet on your vulva during partnered play or between your nipples for external stimulation during penetration. And, as an added bonus, you can get some sexy remote control bullets that let one or both partners control the toy during sex.
Using a Wand Vibe
Introducing a new sex toy can be intimidating, especially if it’s your first time using one. You can break the ice by framing it as an opportunity to try something fun, exciting, and intimate with your partner.
Wand vibrators are great for enhancing sensual experiences and can be used on any part of the body. Try making light circles with the wand on your partner’s nipples, inner thighs, clit, A-hole, and shaft, says Fleming. The soft wand head is perfect for stimulating the clitoris and clitoral hood, and can even be used to gently tease a sensitive spot like the buttocks.
You can also use your wand vibrator to stimulate the G-spot (the area between your clitoral gland and pubic mound). Just be sure to add some lube to the mix first. Fleming recommends water-based lube for this purpose since it glides better on the wand head than silicone-based ones, which can be abrasive.
You can also try the “pillow grind” technique when masturbating with a wand vibrator. Place the wand between your legs and lie back, with 2-3 pillows supporting your hips. Then, lean the wand head against your vulva and turn on a high-power setting. This will create a deep vibration that feels amazing when the wand head hits your G-spot and clitoral hood. Try experimenting with different angles and power settings to find your favorites.
Using a Finger Vibe
The nimble nature of the finger vibe makes it one of the best toys for clitoral stimulation. While fingering with a vibrator is fun for solo play, it also works well during couples’ sex. To get the most out of your finger vibe, make sure you apply a good amount of lube to it and to your finger. This will reduce the friction that might cause discomfort.
Whether you’re using a finger vibe in sex alone or with a partner, it’s important to know how to use your vibe properly. To ensure your sex toy is safe, it’s a good idea to use a non-toxic sex toy cleaner to thoroughly wash it between uses. Then, it’s a good idea to put it in a clean pouch or case and store it somewhere it won’t be exposed to dirt or germs.
In addition to the tips mentioned above, Fleming notes that women who want to please themselves with a finger vibe should consider running it in their labia majora and minora (which are skin folds that protect your vulva from direct contact). Some people find these areas to be very sensitive and a great place to begin self-pleasure.
It’s also a good idea to experiment with different vibration settings, starting at the lowest and working your way up to the highest. This can help you figure out what’s the most pleasurable for your unique anatomy and will lead to the most intense orgasms.